alwaysenduphere (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
alwaysenduphere) wrote2007-12-13 12:28 am
alwaysenduphere) wrote2007-12-13 12:28 am
Fic: Safety in My Puppy's Arms
Title: Safety in My Puppy's Arms
Author: [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com]
Word Count:1868
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairing: Peter/Elle
Spoilers: vaguely to 2.11
Disclaimers: I own nothing.
A/n: My computer hated me as I was writing this, and it disappeared several times causing me to rewrite it over and over again. I'm not sure how I feel about the finished product. Or the title, for that matter. It's something of a companion piece to Always a Mission, only from Elle's POV.
I was so excited the first time I met Peter.
He was like my new puppy, laying there. Well, I’d never had a puppy, but I knew he’d make a good replacement if I had. Daddy told me he wasn’t a toy, of course. But he could be, I knew it. I sent him a little jolt, and when his eyes opened, I knew he was mine.
He could take whatever shocks I gave him, but I didn’t want to hurt him. Not at first, anyway.
He was so naïve, too, the way he believed everything Daddy told him. I mean, Daddy has to tell things a little differently from the truth sometimes to get things done the right way. I hate it when he does it to me, but I guess I get it. Little naïve Peter. All he wanted was to see his brother. His brother, who he cared so much about. I wanted him to care about me like that.
**
Weeks went by, and I could tell Peter still didn’t trust me. It made me angry. Everyday, I showed up like clockwork, to give him his pills, his ‘Haitian pills” and everyday I waited for him to begin to trust me. I’d given him no reason not to, really. Every day, he just took the pills, and my jolts, because of course I had to have my fun, almost silently. And everyday I left, feeling my heart slowly being chipped away.
Then one day he asked me my story, and I was so excited. He cared, he really did. So I told him. I was surprised how matter-of-fact it sounded when it came out, and I realized as I was saying it how removed I sounded from my own life. The thought made me a little sad. I said “Later Alligator” and dashed out the door before he could see any of my tears fall. Peter Petrelli was starting to get to me more than I wanted him to.
**
His hands on my hips felt good. No man had ever touched me, really, save for some doctors and Daddy, occasionally, and never like this. Except for Adam, and I don’t really count that. I was just curious. Nothing happened. When he pulled me to him, it was like we fit together perfectly.
When Peter kissed me, I thought my world was going to stop for a moment. It was so amazing, my first kiss. I didn’t mean to shock him, either, but I was so lost in the moment, in the feeling, that I lost control, oh so briefly, but I didn’t reign in my power as quickly as I could’ve. I knew he could take it, so I wanted to see his reaction. And he smiled.
I gave him his pills and left the room quickly, before I let the sensation of his body against mine overwhelm my thoughts and cause me to do something Daddy wouldn’t like. But once I was back in his room, I couldn’t help but recall the moment over and over again. My puppy liked me back.
**
My puppy ran away. It had to have been Adam to convince him, it had to have. Adam with his evil plans. I was hurt, and angry. Peter had used me, I knew it. And he was still so naive, too. After months of talking about nothing other than his brother, where else would we go to find him?
When the Haitian and I finally caught up with them, I couldn’t control my anger and my hurt. It’d been a very long time, longer than I could remember, since I’d used the full power of my blast, but I aimed it directly at Peter. He could take it, and it made me feel better anyway. Daddy would be proud of me when we brought him back.
I directed the rest of my anger at Adam, for corrupting my puppy. I knew the Haitian could take care of Peter.
**
“It’s not my fault!” I pouted at Daddy. How was I supposed to know a blast that strong wouldn’t slow Peter down enough for the Haitian to catch up with him? I had a feeling there was something the Haitian wasn’t saying, but of course Daddy would never believe me. His faith in me was already shaken.
“You’re better than this, Elle.” He said.
I’d show him.
**
When Daddy told me they had a lead on Peter, I was ecstatic. When he let me go to Ireland, by myself, I knew I had his trust back. It was one of the only times I’d ever been outside the company walls by myself, and I was so excited. In a way, I was almost thankful for Peter for escaping. Sometimes I felt like a caged bird inside the Company. Peter had made me feel freedom twice now. When he kissed me, and when I made it to Ireland.
But the man at the pub was not useful to me, and I got a little too angry again. Using my full force really did make me feel better, especially when it was directed at someone. I imagined that the Irish man was Peter, and I let out my anger. I almost felt bad, knowing that if Peter did know the man, he wouldn’t be happy with me. But I wasn’t happy, so why should he be?
**
Daddy stopped trusting me again. I got a stupid partner, although he was pretty. But he was no replacement for my puppy, even though I acted like he’d do. He had a silly name and silly thoughts I didn’t care to understand, and he ended up getting me shot. I wanted to kill him, but Daddy would never approve.
I still cared what Daddy thought. Even when Mr. Bennet told me what Daddy had done to me. I wondered what would’ve happened if I’d told Peter that part of the story, as well, if it would’ve made him stay. But then I thought better about that. I didn’t need his pity. Or Mr. Bennets. I just needed Daddy to trust me again.
**
Daddy called me to tell me that Peter was coming back. I asked who had caught him, and got momentarily angry when I realized that it hadn’t been me. But then Daddy said he’d returned all on his own, and I was more than curious. But I was forbidden to see him, Daddy said. He still had all his powers, and he wasn’t giving them up.
I didn’t know what to do. It’d been awhile since the last time I’d seen him, but everything that he’d done to me was still fresh in my mind. After all, I had nothing else to do but think about how I’d lost him. Daddy took every opportunity he had to remind me that “I was better than that.” I was really starting not to like dear old Bob. I couldn’t make him proud no matter what I did.
**
I walked by Peter’s room a couple of times. I was curious as to why Daddy would let him keep his powers, but I knew he’d never tell me. When I saw Peter, I figured out why. He didn’t look like he could hurt a fly. I mean, if he wanted to, he probably could, but all the life was gone out of him. All that curiosity he’d had when I’d known him in the months prior.
I wanted to go in, comfort him, and make all his pain go away. I didn’t like seeing my puppy sad. I’d never had a brother or a sister, or anyone really, to care about, to mourn if he or she died, except Bob, and he wasn’t high on my list of caring at the moment, not as high as Peter was. But I didn’t go in. I was supposed to be angry at Peter, and I was supposed to be Daddy’s good little girl. I had to keep up my appearances, now, didn’t I?
**
One day Daddy called me to his office, told me that if I really wanted to, I could go and visit Peter now, but only if I did something for him. With Daddy’s approval, of course I wanted to. I was hurt and I was angry and I wanted answers as to why he used me so. Even if I could almost guess that the answer would be that I didn’t matter to him.
“Don’t disappoint me, Elle.” Daddy had said as I walked out of his office. I’d pretended not to hear him.
As I walked to Peter’s room, I realized I had no idea what I was going to say to him. There were hundreds of other people in the building who could’ve gone to get Peter, people I should’ve let go. But Daddy’d given me the opportunity. I couldn’t pass it up.
I was angry, I was hurt, but when I stepped into that room, all I wanted to do was fix my toy. I didn’t want apologies or explanations, either, really. Neither one could make up for the sheer amount of hurt I’d had since he’d ran away from me. I tried to hold onto my anger, I didn’t want him to know how much I cared, didn’t want him to pull me into his very non-toy-like arms, but it was happening before I knew which way was up.
I knew that electricity and tears didn’t go together, but I needed a little pain to help bring me back to reality, and I let go. I was angry, I was hurt, and his little apology and the feeling of safety in his oh so comfortable arms wasn’t going to erase all the other feelings. I wasn’t going to let it.
I watched him in agony. It was ironic, the only times I’d ever used my full force, well, that I remember, were in relation to him. It was nice having a puppy that healed everything. It could come in use later on in life.
And that’s what I really wanted, and I knew it. I wanted a later in life with Peter, I did. So I waited for him to stop agonizing over the pain I’d caused him. I didn’t feel bad at all, more like justified for all the pain and hurt he’d caused me.
“I don’t like being used, Peter,” I said. And he looked at me, with those beautiful puppy eyes, and I could see he truly was sorry. Even better, I could almost see that he cared. But he’d need to convince me of it a little more.
Not this day, though. This day, I wanted to feel safe. I wanted my puppy to have something to not look sad about. I wanted a lot of things from life, Peter had made me realize, and damn if he wasn’t going to help me get them.
“I’m glad you’re back,” I whispered to him. And as I leaned into him, safe in his arms, I realized I would do anything to make my puppy happy, because I loved him.
But I still had a job to do. “Now let’s go see Daddy!” I said, relinquishing the moment to the task at hand.
Author: [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com]
Word Count:1868
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairing: Peter/Elle
Spoilers: vaguely to 2.11
Disclaimers: I own nothing.
A/n: My computer hated me as I was writing this, and it disappeared several times causing me to rewrite it over and over again. I'm not sure how I feel about the finished product. Or the title, for that matter. It's something of a companion piece to Always a Mission, only from Elle's POV.
I was so excited the first time I met Peter.
He was like my new puppy, laying there. Well, I’d never had a puppy, but I knew he’d make a good replacement if I had. Daddy told me he wasn’t a toy, of course. But he could be, I knew it. I sent him a little jolt, and when his eyes opened, I knew he was mine.
He could take whatever shocks I gave him, but I didn’t want to hurt him. Not at first, anyway.
He was so naïve, too, the way he believed everything Daddy told him. I mean, Daddy has to tell things a little differently from the truth sometimes to get things done the right way. I hate it when he does it to me, but I guess I get it. Little naïve Peter. All he wanted was to see his brother. His brother, who he cared so much about. I wanted him to care about me like that.
**
Weeks went by, and I could tell Peter still didn’t trust me. It made me angry. Everyday, I showed up like clockwork, to give him his pills, his ‘Haitian pills” and everyday I waited for him to begin to trust me. I’d given him no reason not to, really. Every day, he just took the pills, and my jolts, because of course I had to have my fun, almost silently. And everyday I left, feeling my heart slowly being chipped away.
Then one day he asked me my story, and I was so excited. He cared, he really did. So I told him. I was surprised how matter-of-fact it sounded when it came out, and I realized as I was saying it how removed I sounded from my own life. The thought made me a little sad. I said “Later Alligator” and dashed out the door before he could see any of my tears fall. Peter Petrelli was starting to get to me more than I wanted him to.
**
His hands on my hips felt good. No man had ever touched me, really, save for some doctors and Daddy, occasionally, and never like this. Except for Adam, and I don’t really count that. I was just curious. Nothing happened. When he pulled me to him, it was like we fit together perfectly.
When Peter kissed me, I thought my world was going to stop for a moment. It was so amazing, my first kiss. I didn’t mean to shock him, either, but I was so lost in the moment, in the feeling, that I lost control, oh so briefly, but I didn’t reign in my power as quickly as I could’ve. I knew he could take it, so I wanted to see his reaction. And he smiled.
I gave him his pills and left the room quickly, before I let the sensation of his body against mine overwhelm my thoughts and cause me to do something Daddy wouldn’t like. But once I was back in his room, I couldn’t help but recall the moment over and over again. My puppy liked me back.
**
My puppy ran away. It had to have been Adam to convince him, it had to have. Adam with his evil plans. I was hurt, and angry. Peter had used me, I knew it. And he was still so naive, too. After months of talking about nothing other than his brother, where else would we go to find him?
When the Haitian and I finally caught up with them, I couldn’t control my anger and my hurt. It’d been a very long time, longer than I could remember, since I’d used the full power of my blast, but I aimed it directly at Peter. He could take it, and it made me feel better anyway. Daddy would be proud of me when we brought him back.
I directed the rest of my anger at Adam, for corrupting my puppy. I knew the Haitian could take care of Peter.
**
“It’s not my fault!” I pouted at Daddy. How was I supposed to know a blast that strong wouldn’t slow Peter down enough for the Haitian to catch up with him? I had a feeling there was something the Haitian wasn’t saying, but of course Daddy would never believe me. His faith in me was already shaken.
“You’re better than this, Elle.” He said.
I’d show him.
**
When Daddy told me they had a lead on Peter, I was ecstatic. When he let me go to Ireland, by myself, I knew I had his trust back. It was one of the only times I’d ever been outside the company walls by myself, and I was so excited. In a way, I was almost thankful for Peter for escaping. Sometimes I felt like a caged bird inside the Company. Peter had made me feel freedom twice now. When he kissed me, and when I made it to Ireland.
But the man at the pub was not useful to me, and I got a little too angry again. Using my full force really did make me feel better, especially when it was directed at someone. I imagined that the Irish man was Peter, and I let out my anger. I almost felt bad, knowing that if Peter did know the man, he wouldn’t be happy with me. But I wasn’t happy, so why should he be?
**
Daddy stopped trusting me again. I got a stupid partner, although he was pretty. But he was no replacement for my puppy, even though I acted like he’d do. He had a silly name and silly thoughts I didn’t care to understand, and he ended up getting me shot. I wanted to kill him, but Daddy would never approve.
I still cared what Daddy thought. Even when Mr. Bennet told me what Daddy had done to me. I wondered what would’ve happened if I’d told Peter that part of the story, as well, if it would’ve made him stay. But then I thought better about that. I didn’t need his pity. Or Mr. Bennets. I just needed Daddy to trust me again.
**
Daddy called me to tell me that Peter was coming back. I asked who had caught him, and got momentarily angry when I realized that it hadn’t been me. But then Daddy said he’d returned all on his own, and I was more than curious. But I was forbidden to see him, Daddy said. He still had all his powers, and he wasn’t giving them up.
I didn’t know what to do. It’d been awhile since the last time I’d seen him, but everything that he’d done to me was still fresh in my mind. After all, I had nothing else to do but think about how I’d lost him. Daddy took every opportunity he had to remind me that “I was better than that.” I was really starting not to like dear old Bob. I couldn’t make him proud no matter what I did.
**
I walked by Peter’s room a couple of times. I was curious as to why Daddy would let him keep his powers, but I knew he’d never tell me. When I saw Peter, I figured out why. He didn’t look like he could hurt a fly. I mean, if he wanted to, he probably could, but all the life was gone out of him. All that curiosity he’d had when I’d known him in the months prior.
I wanted to go in, comfort him, and make all his pain go away. I didn’t like seeing my puppy sad. I’d never had a brother or a sister, or anyone really, to care about, to mourn if he or she died, except Bob, and he wasn’t high on my list of caring at the moment, not as high as Peter was. But I didn’t go in. I was supposed to be angry at Peter, and I was supposed to be Daddy’s good little girl. I had to keep up my appearances, now, didn’t I?
**
One day Daddy called me to his office, told me that if I really wanted to, I could go and visit Peter now, but only if I did something for him. With Daddy’s approval, of course I wanted to. I was hurt and I was angry and I wanted answers as to why he used me so. Even if I could almost guess that the answer would be that I didn’t matter to him.
“Don’t disappoint me, Elle.” Daddy had said as I walked out of his office. I’d pretended not to hear him.
As I walked to Peter’s room, I realized I had no idea what I was going to say to him. There were hundreds of other people in the building who could’ve gone to get Peter, people I should’ve let go. But Daddy’d given me the opportunity. I couldn’t pass it up.
I was angry, I was hurt, but when I stepped into that room, all I wanted to do was fix my toy. I didn’t want apologies or explanations, either, really. Neither one could make up for the sheer amount of hurt I’d had since he’d ran away from me. I tried to hold onto my anger, I didn’t want him to know how much I cared, didn’t want him to pull me into his very non-toy-like arms, but it was happening before I knew which way was up.
I knew that electricity and tears didn’t go together, but I needed a little pain to help bring me back to reality, and I let go. I was angry, I was hurt, and his little apology and the feeling of safety in his oh so comfortable arms wasn’t going to erase all the other feelings. I wasn’t going to let it.
I watched him in agony. It was ironic, the only times I’d ever used my full force, well, that I remember, were in relation to him. It was nice having a puppy that healed everything. It could come in use later on in life.
And that’s what I really wanted, and I knew it. I wanted a later in life with Peter, I did. So I waited for him to stop agonizing over the pain I’d caused him. I didn’t feel bad at all, more like justified for all the pain and hurt he’d caused me.
“I don’t like being used, Peter,” I said. And he looked at me, with those beautiful puppy eyes, and I could see he truly was sorry. Even better, I could almost see that he cared. But he’d need to convince me of it a little more.
Not this day, though. This day, I wanted to feel safe. I wanted my puppy to have something to not look sad about. I wanted a lot of things from life, Peter had made me realize, and damn if he wasn’t going to help me get them.
“I’m glad you’re back,” I whispered to him. And as I leaned into him, safe in his arms, I realized I would do anything to make my puppy happy, because I loved him.
But I still had a job to do. “Now let’s go see Daddy!” I said, relinquishing the moment to the task at hand.
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I really didn't want it to end lol
Great job =D
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Elle and Peter just rock my socks, I guess. :P